I've been watching teachers struggle with the overwhelm of national, state, and district expectations. Seasoned professionals have had to change their practices to meet these demands, leaving behind the lessons they most enjoy teaching, those that have the greatest chance of changing, befitting and delighting their students.

I now understand the sadness of that situation first hand. For two years, I've been working to help teachers satisfy their writing goals. Recently, I saw how these goals conflict with my greater desire to inspire children's love of writing.

My understanding came from a discussion with Gina Pace, a third grade teacher at Estes. I met Pace two years ago in a writing workshop and quickly recognized her passion for teaching and willingness to plunge right into the messy and miraculous writing process I'd evolved. Gina Pace understands and loves real writing, the kind that comes from putting the alignment of children's heads, hearts and spirits before the expectations of the curriculum.

Last September, Pace studied community with her students. This is a stated curriculum goal, but Pace had a new take on it. She wanted to transform her classroom into a community and she had a Native American parent who wanted to share the culture of the Indian community. When 911 came, so did an opportunity for a vibrant lesson.

Pace and her Native American parent invited five Indian elders to come to Chapel Hill and teach her students how to make dream catchers. The plan was to send these dream catchers to the children of NYC firefighters who had died. In a special ceremony, the elders gathered the dream catchers and letters each child had written. Each letter began, "Dear Friend" and contained heart-felt sympathies, all of them honestly and eloquently expressed in a range of fresh, original voices.

One letter explained, "The dream catchers will help you by night if you have a bad dream it catches and if it axadentaly (accidentally) catches a good one it lets it filter through."

Another child was tender and philosophical. "I am very sad that you lost a parent. Remember that he or she was a hero. They'll never really be gone if you still remember them, they live on in your mind and heart."

A third child drew a striking comparison. "I am so so sorry that your family member has died. That is worse than anything bad that has happened to me. All the bad things (that) have happened to me, if they were all together in a problem it still would not (be) equal to what just happened to you."

During this project, Gina Pace's classroom became a caring community, her students learned much about the richness of Indian culture, and they reached out to heal a third community. Both her story and the writings of the students brought me to tears.

My mission at Estes was to put together workshops that would help the teachers with writing goals they had to meet. I could certainly bring play and vitality to prompt writing, but hearing Pace's story gave me a sad perspective. Writings that come from test prompts will never be as deep or stirring as those letters, or as involving and exciting as my messy, non-linear story creation process. The writing test developed by the state of North Carolina has confining and specific requirements . To meet those objectives, I've had to give up many of the elements that matter most to children. I suspect many teachers have had to do the same thing in all areas of learning.

I spoke with a teacher who said she has a whole cabinet full of fun activities that are her passion to teach, but because of all the mandated requirements, she has not opened that cupboard all year. At a PTSA meeting I heard a report that PTA Council invited a panel of teachers to speak about their needs. Their main concern was the overwhelm they face because of all the national, state and district requirements.

This January, Susan B. Neuman, the U.S. Assistant Secretary of Elementary and Secondary Education wrote, "I want to change the face of reading instruction across the United States from an art to a science."

Her comment chills me. It denies teachers the right to their creativity and denigrates teaching as an art form. If Newman has her way there will be more standards teachers have to meet, more to overpower and erode their attempts to make learning meaningful for students, and fewer life-changing lessons that students will remember forever.